1 00:00:03,612 --> 00:00:05,918 YO-O-O, JOE! 2 00:00:06,006 --> 00:00:08,704 ♪ HE'LL FIGHT FOR FREEDOM WHEREVER THERE'S TROUBLE ♪ 3 00:00:08,791 --> 00:00:10,488 ♪ G.I. JOE IS THERE 4 00:00:10,575 --> 00:00:13,665 ♪ G.I. JOE, A REAL AMERICAN HERO ♪ 5 00:00:13,752 --> 00:00:16,668 ♪ G.I. JOE IS THERE 6 00:00:16,755 --> 00:00:19,236 ♪ IT'S G.I. JOE AGAINST COBRA THE ENEMY ♪ 7 00:00:19,323 --> 00:00:21,195 ♪ FIGHTING TO SAVE THE DAY 8 00:00:21,282 --> 00:00:24,589 ♪ HE NEVER GIVES UP, HE'S ALWAYS THERE ♪ 9 00:00:24,676 --> 00:00:27,766 ♪ FIGHTING FOR FREEDOM OVER LAND AND AIR ♪ 10 00:00:27,853 --> 00:00:30,726 ♪ G.I. JOE, A REAL AMERICAN HERO ♪ 11 00:00:30,813 --> 00:00:34,295 ♪ G.I. JOE IS THERE 12 00:00:34,382 --> 00:00:35,861 G.I. JOE IS THE CODE NAME 13 00:00:35,948 --> 00:00:39,256 FOR AMERICA'S DARING, HIGHLY TRAINED SPECIAL-MISSION FORCE. 14 00:00:39,343 --> 00:00:42,868 ITS PURPOSE -- TO DEFEND HUMAN FREEDOM AGAINST COBRA, 15 00:00:42,955 --> 00:00:44,783 A RUTHLESS TERRORIST ORGANIZATION 16 00:00:44,870 --> 00:00:47,047 DETERMINED TO RULE THE WORLD. 17 00:00:47,134 --> 00:00:48,352 ♪ HE NEVER GIVES UP 18 00:00:48,439 --> 00:00:50,398 ♪ HE'LL STAY TILL THE FIGHT'S WON ♪ 19 00:00:50,485 --> 00:00:52,269 ♪ G.I. JOE WILL DARE 20 00:00:52,356 --> 00:00:55,794 ♪ G.I. JOE, A REAL AMERICAN HERO ♪ 21 00:00:55,881 --> 00:01:01,017 ♪ G.I. JOE 22 00:01:15,945 --> 00:01:18,295 YO-O-O, JOE! 23 00:01:21,907 --> 00:01:24,084 YO-O-O, JOE! 24 00:01:28,218 --> 00:01:32,048 EAT HOT SALT TABS, YA SCURVY LANDLUBBERS! 25 00:01:36,226 --> 00:01:40,317 AAH, YOU GOT ME! 26 00:01:40,404 --> 00:01:42,667 UGH! 27 00:01:44,104 --> 00:01:45,844 AAH! 28 00:01:48,412 --> 00:01:50,197 AAH! 29 00:01:50,284 --> 00:01:52,634 SHIPWRECK, THAT IS PATHETIC. 30 00:01:52,721 --> 00:01:55,506 [ LAUGHS ] SAYS YOU. 31 00:01:55,593 --> 00:01:57,639 I THOUGHT I DESERVED AN OSCAR. 32 00:01:57,726 --> 00:02:00,859 YEAH, MY UNCLE OSCAR, THE MOOCHER. 33 00:02:00,946 --> 00:02:04,776 Scarlett: CEASE FIRE! EVERYBODY, CEASE FIRING! 34 00:02:04,863 --> 00:02:06,996 CIVILIANS IN THE BATTLE AREA! 35 00:02:07,083 --> 00:02:08,519 AW, NUTS! 36 00:02:08,606 --> 00:02:10,304 JUST WHEN THE FIGHT WAS GETTING DIRTY. 37 00:02:10,391 --> 00:02:11,827 Hector: ARE WE READY, TOM? 38 00:02:11,914 --> 00:02:13,481 -Tom: WE'RE ROLLIN'! -GOOD. 39 00:02:13,568 --> 00:02:15,526 THIS IS HECTOR RAMIREZ 40 00:02:15,613 --> 00:02:18,268 REPORTING FOR YOUR TV NEWS MAGAZINE "TWENTY QUESTIONS." 41 00:02:18,355 --> 00:02:20,531 AND BELOW US IS THE G.I. JOE TEAM, 42 00:02:20,618 --> 00:02:23,447 AMERICA'S SPECIAL ANTI-TERRORIST TASK FORCE. 43 00:02:23,534 --> 00:02:25,623 BUT DOES AMERICA NEED THEM? 44 00:02:25,710 --> 00:02:27,147 SOME PEOPLE CLAIM 45 00:02:27,234 --> 00:02:30,498 THE JOES ARE A NEEDLESS MILITARY EXTRAVAGANCE AT BEST, 46 00:02:30,585 --> 00:02:34,458 AND A BLATANT RIP-OFF OF THE AMERICAN TAXPAYER AT WORST. 47 00:02:34,545 --> 00:02:35,894 CUT. 48 00:02:35,981 --> 00:02:37,157 OKAY, HOW WAS THAT? 49 00:02:37,244 --> 00:02:40,334 YES, YES, PERFECT! PERFECT! 50 00:02:40,421 --> 00:02:43,641 Flint: OKAY, WHAT IN THE NAME OF SANITY ARE YOU PEOPLE DOIN' HERE? 51 00:02:43,728 --> 00:02:45,904 THIS IS A RESTRICTED AREA! 52 00:02:45,991 --> 00:02:47,732 HOW DO YOU ANSWER THE CLAIMS 53 00:02:47,819 --> 00:02:49,952 THAT COBRA IS ONLY AN ELABORATE HOAX 54 00:02:50,039 --> 00:02:51,780 TO BILK THE GOVERNMENT OF BILLIONS OF DOLLARS? 55 00:02:51,867 --> 00:02:52,955 WHAT? 56 00:02:53,042 --> 00:02:55,000 CAREFUL, FLINT. THAT'S THAT TV NEWS GUY. 57 00:02:55,087 --> 00:02:57,481 YEAH. HE'LL FEED YOU LINES AND HANG YOU WITH 'EM. 58 00:02:57,568 --> 00:02:59,744 UH, SORRY, NO COMMENT AT THIS TIME. 59 00:02:59,831 --> 00:03:02,791 THEN I DEMAND TO SEE YOUR COMMANDING OFFICER. 60 00:03:04,662 --> 00:03:05,924 Flint: DUKE'S OFF-BASE. 61 00:03:06,011 --> 00:03:07,361 HE WON'T BE BACK FOR A COUPLE OF HOURS. 62 00:03:07,448 --> 00:03:09,189 BUT YOU GENTLEMEN CAN WAIT HERE IN HIS OFFICE, 63 00:03:09,276 --> 00:03:11,191 AND I'LL GET A GUIDE TO SHOW YOU AROUND THE BASE. 64 00:03:12,409 --> 00:03:14,716 NOW WHAT, SEMI-FEARLESS LEADER? 65 00:03:14,803 --> 00:03:17,109 FIND A GUIDE AND CALL FOR DUKE. 66 00:03:17,197 --> 00:03:19,111 WELL, IF THEY'RE SIPHONING OFF MILLIONS, 67 00:03:19,199 --> 00:03:21,505 THEY SURE AREN'T SPENDING IT ON INTERIOR DECORATING. 68 00:03:21,592 --> 00:03:24,595 THAT -- THAT'S WHAT THEY WANT YOU TO THINK! 69 00:03:24,682 --> 00:03:27,685 MY FRIENDS, THE COMMITTEE ON BASIC REDUCTIONS OF ARMIES 70 00:03:27,772 --> 00:03:29,209 HAS CONCLUSIVE PROOF 71 00:03:29,296 --> 00:03:33,256 THAT THE ENTIRE G.I. JOE/COBRA CONFLICT IS FAKED! 72 00:03:33,343 --> 00:03:35,998 F-A-K-E-D! FAKED! 73 00:03:36,085 --> 00:03:37,260 COME OFF IT! 74 00:03:37,347 --> 00:03:39,175 I'VE SEEN THE NEWS FOOTAGE. IT'S REAL. 75 00:03:39,262 --> 00:03:40,785 OH, WELL, HECTOR, 76 00:03:40,872 --> 00:03:43,614 IF YOU'RE GONNA LET THE HIRED HELP INFLUENCE YOUR DECISIONS... 77 00:03:43,701 --> 00:03:45,529 Tom: "HIRED HELP"? 78 00:03:45,616 --> 00:03:46,791 COOL IT, TOM. 79 00:03:46,878 --> 00:03:49,098 I'LL MAKE THE DECISIONS. 80 00:03:49,185 --> 00:03:54,495 HMM, I WONDER IF THERE'S AN EMMY IN THIS FOR ME? 81 00:03:54,582 --> 00:03:58,586 AH, GENTLEMEN, OBSERVE THE PROPERTIES OF THE CUE BALL. 82 00:03:58,673 --> 00:04:01,284 SO ROUND, SO FIRM. 83 00:04:01,371 --> 00:04:04,331 WANT TO BET I CAN MAKE IT SIT UP AND BARK? 84 00:04:04,418 --> 00:04:07,943 WHAT THE UNIVERSE WILLS THE BALL TO DO, IT SHALL DO. 85 00:04:08,030 --> 00:04:10,250 THERE ARE NO GAMES OF CHANCE IN THE -- 86 00:04:10,337 --> 00:04:13,470 [ LAUGHS ] GOOD OLD SPIRIT. 87 00:04:13,557 --> 00:04:15,167 MR. FRIVOLITY. 88 00:04:15,255 --> 00:04:17,648 SHIPWRECK, I'VE GOT A JOB FOR YOU. 89 00:04:17,735 --> 00:04:20,129 OH, SORRY. CAN'T TAKE IT, FLINT. 90 00:04:20,216 --> 00:04:22,610 I WAS KILLED IN ACTION DURING MANEUVERS. 91 00:04:22,697 --> 00:04:24,046 LOOK, STOW IT, SHIPWRECK. 92 00:04:24,133 --> 00:04:26,875 I'VE GOT THREE CIVILIANS WHO NEED BABYSITTING. 93 00:04:28,006 --> 00:04:30,052 Shipwreck: AND HERE'S WHERE WE KEEP 94 00:04:30,139 --> 00:04:33,969 OUR SKY HAWKS, SKYSTRIKERS, AND DRAGONFLIES. 95 00:04:34,056 --> 00:04:36,537 WHAT ABOUT SKY HAWK COST OVERRUNS? 96 00:04:36,624 --> 00:04:38,974 I DON'T KNOW NOTHIN' ABOUT IT. 97 00:04:39,061 --> 00:04:41,672 HE -- HE'S JUST PUTTING UP OBSTACLES! 98 00:04:41,759 --> 00:04:42,891 OBSTACLES, HUH?! 99 00:04:42,978 --> 00:04:45,633 YOU WANT TO SEE OBSTACLES? 100 00:04:45,720 --> 00:04:47,417 [ INDISTINCT SHOUTING ] 101 00:04:47,504 --> 00:04:48,810 OVER THERE, 102 00:04:48,897 --> 00:04:51,639 YOU GOT WHAT YOU CALL YOUR SWINGIN'-LOG OBSTACLE. 103 00:04:51,726 --> 00:04:54,685 THEN THERE'S YOUR OLD-TIRE OBSTACLE. 104 00:04:54,772 --> 00:04:57,732 AND YOUR BRICK-WALL OBSTACLE. AND -- 105 00:04:57,819 --> 00:05:00,778 OH, PERFECT TRAINING, IF YOU PLAN TO FIGHT -- 106 00:05:00,865 --> 00:05:03,172 TO FIGHT IN A PLAYGROUND! 107 00:05:03,259 --> 00:05:07,002 I'LL SHOW YOU OUR PLAYGROUND, MATE! 108 00:05:10,614 --> 00:05:13,095 THIS IS OUR LIGHT-WEAPONS RANGE. 109 00:05:13,182 --> 00:05:15,967 WE PRACTICE ON POP-UP CARDBOARD TARGETS. 110 00:05:16,054 --> 00:05:17,491 HOW APPROPRIATE, 111 00:05:17,578 --> 00:05:22,191 SINCE YOUR ENEMY IS ALSO A CARDBOARD FABRICATION! 112 00:05:22,278 --> 00:05:25,237 THAT DOES IT, YOU BLASTED BILGE RAT! 113 00:05:25,325 --> 00:05:29,241 I'LL PROVE TO YOU ONCE AND FOR ALL THAT COBRA'S FOR REAL! 114 00:05:34,508 --> 00:05:36,597 YOU! 115 00:05:36,684 --> 00:05:39,251 I TOLD YOU TO STAY OUTSIDE! 116 00:05:39,339 --> 00:05:41,515 NO FILMING IN HERE! TOP SECRET! 117 00:05:41,602 --> 00:05:43,647 UH, WOULDN'T IT BE BETTER 118 00:05:43,734 --> 00:05:44,953 IF ALL THESE COMPUTERS 119 00:05:45,040 --> 00:05:47,608 WERE USED TO SOLVE WORLD HUNGER INSTEAD OF -- 120 00:05:47,695 --> 00:05:48,870 WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO? 121 00:05:48,957 --> 00:05:52,134 FEED THE WORLD A SHORT STACK OF FLOPPY DISKS? 122 00:05:52,221 --> 00:05:55,485 WELL, IT MAKES MORE SENSE THAN FIGHTING SENSELESS BATTLES 123 00:05:55,572 --> 00:05:59,620 AGAINST NONEXISTENT -- NONEXISTENT ENEMIES. 124 00:05:59,707 --> 00:06:01,230 SENSELESS, HUH? 125 00:06:01,317 --> 00:06:04,276 NONEXISTENT, HUH? 126 00:06:04,364 --> 00:06:07,105 THE COMPUTER SAYS OUR MADE-UP SNAKES 127 00:06:07,192 --> 00:06:09,456 HAVE GOT SOMETHING COOKING IN THE ROCKIES. 128 00:06:09,543 --> 00:06:12,937 LET'S JUST TAKE A TRIP AND SEE, HUH? 129 00:06:13,024 --> 00:06:15,244 JUST LAY LOW TILL WE GET OUT OF HERE. 130 00:06:15,331 --> 00:06:17,942 I'LL SHOW YOU SOME REAL COBRA ACTIVITY. 131 00:06:18,029 --> 00:06:19,422 HEY, SHIPWRECK, WHAT'S UP? 132 00:06:19,509 --> 00:06:22,382 UH, JUST TAKIN' HER UP FOR A TEST FLIGHT, GUYS. 133 00:06:22,469 --> 00:06:23,383 NEED A CO-PILOT? 134 00:06:23,470 --> 00:06:27,038 NO. UH, NO. NO, THANKS, ACE. 135 00:06:30,346 --> 00:06:32,740 SAY, I THOUGHT HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE 136 00:06:32,827 --> 00:06:34,742 SHOWING SOME CIVILIANS AROUND. 137 00:06:34,829 --> 00:06:37,527 NEXT STOP -- THE ROCKIES! 138 00:06:40,008 --> 00:06:41,879 [ SHEEP BLEATING ] 139 00:06:46,362 --> 00:06:48,059 GET READY. 140 00:06:48,146 --> 00:06:50,410 ANOTHER AIRCRAFT APPROACHES. 141 00:06:50,497 --> 00:06:52,890 Ripper: HEADING STRAIGHT AT US, MATE. 142 00:06:52,977 --> 00:06:57,373 COR! I AIN'T DESTROYED NOTHING IN TWO OR THREE DAYS! 143 00:07:01,986 --> 00:07:05,033 Arnold: WHAT A WASTE OF TAXPAYERS' TIME AND MONEY -- 144 00:07:05,120 --> 00:07:07,122 JOYRIDING OVER THE ROCKIES! 145 00:07:07,209 --> 00:07:08,645 Shipwreck: JOYRIDE? 146 00:07:08,732 --> 00:07:12,257 IF WE SPOT COBRA, THIS IS ONE RIDE YOU'LL NEVER FORGET! 147 00:07:12,344 --> 00:07:13,694 FIRE. 148 00:07:13,781 --> 00:07:16,740 RIGHT, THEN. 149 00:07:18,873 --> 00:07:20,352 Shipwreck: UH-OH. S.A.M.! 150 00:07:20,440 --> 00:07:23,704 MY NAME IS ARNOLD, NOT SAM! 151 00:07:23,791 --> 00:07:26,271 Shipwreck: NOT SAM! S-A-M! 152 00:07:26,358 --> 00:07:28,883 SURFACE-TO-AIR MISSILE! 153 00:07:28,970 --> 00:07:31,538 NOW SHUT UP AND LET ME FLY! 154 00:07:36,456 --> 00:07:38,240 [ ALL SHOUTING ] 155 00:07:38,327 --> 00:07:41,417 TOLD YOU YOU'D NEVER FORGET THIS RIDE! 156 00:07:41,504 --> 00:07:44,464 NOW ALL WE'VE GOT TO DO IS LIVE THROUGH IT! 157 00:08:02,917 --> 00:08:04,266 Cover Girl: SHIPWRECK? 158 00:08:04,353 --> 00:08:06,747 HEY, SHIPWRECK! WHERE ARE YOU? 159 00:08:06,834 --> 00:08:08,879 FLINT WANTS YOU AND YOUR GUESTS! 160 00:08:08,966 --> 00:08:13,449 ACE, RIP CORD, EITHER OF YOU GUYS SEEN SHIPWRECK? 161 00:08:13,536 --> 00:08:14,537 HE TOOK OFF. 162 00:08:14,624 --> 00:08:15,799 TOOK OFF? 163 00:08:15,886 --> 00:08:17,888 SAID HE WAS GOING ON A TEST FLIGHT. 164 00:08:17,975 --> 00:08:19,499 I THOUGHT IT LOOKED SUSPICIOUS. 165 00:08:19,586 --> 00:08:21,936 SO I CHECKED AROUND AND FOUND SHIPWRECK AND THOSE CIVILIANS 166 00:08:22,023 --> 00:08:23,546 HAD BEEN HERE. 167 00:08:23,633 --> 00:08:25,156 OH, BAD NEWS. 168 00:08:25,243 --> 00:08:26,680 IF THAT COMPUTER'S RIGHT, 169 00:08:26,767 --> 00:08:29,639 SHIPWRECK'S HEADING TOWARD THE ROCKIES AND CERTAIN DEATH. 170 00:08:29,726 --> 00:08:31,162 YOU MEAN COBRA? 171 00:08:31,249 --> 00:08:33,774 I MEAN DUKE, WHEN HE FINDS OUT. 172 00:08:35,210 --> 00:08:36,907 YOU'RE GONNA KILL US! 173 00:08:36,994 --> 00:08:39,954 SHUT UP! I KNOW WHAT I'M DOING! 174 00:08:51,705 --> 00:08:55,926 SEE, I TOLD YOU I'D GET US DOWN SAFE. 175 00:09:02,542 --> 00:09:04,544 Alpine: YUCKO! HOW DISGUSTIN'! 176 00:09:04,631 --> 00:09:07,024 PROBABLY GONNA DIE FROM SOME DISEASE. 177 00:09:07,111 --> 00:09:09,374 HAVE NO FEAR FOR MY HEALTH, ALPINE. 178 00:09:10,811 --> 00:09:11,812 I DON'T. 179 00:09:11,899 --> 00:09:13,683 I'M WORRIED ABOUT FREEDOM. 180 00:09:13,770 --> 00:09:16,251 Cover Girl: ALPINE! YOU'VE GOT TO HELP US. 181 00:09:16,338 --> 00:09:19,428 SHIPWRECK MAY BE IN BIG TROUBLE SOMEWHERE IN THE ROCKIES. 182 00:09:19,515 --> 00:09:23,084 NATURALLY. WHERE ELSE WOULD YOU EXPECT TO FIND A SAILOR IN TROUBLE? 183 00:09:25,826 --> 00:09:29,438 Shipwreck: WE'LL FIND THAT COBRA MISSILE LAUNCHER AROUND HERE SOMEWHERE. 184 00:09:29,525 --> 00:09:32,572 Arnold: MISSILE LAUNCHER? MISSILE LAUNCHER? 185 00:09:32,659 --> 00:09:35,575 A WILD-GOOSE CHASE TO KEEP US FROM THE STORY! 186 00:09:35,662 --> 00:09:38,665 I'LL LAUNCH YOU IF YOU DON'T KEEP YOUR FOOL TRAP SHUT! 187 00:09:38,752 --> 00:09:40,623 [ HELICOPTER BLADES WHIRRING ] WAIT A MINUTE. LISTEN. 188 00:09:40,710 --> 00:09:43,365 HEY! HEY! OVER HERE! 189 00:09:43,452 --> 00:09:45,149 YO-O-O, JOE! 190 00:09:45,236 --> 00:09:48,762 KEEP A SHARP EYE PEELED FOR SHIPWRECK AND COBRA. 191 00:09:51,329 --> 00:09:54,419 ZARTAN, I'M PICKIN' UP SOMETHING ON THE RADAR. 192 00:09:54,506 --> 00:09:56,639 Zartan: A JOE SEARCH PARTY. 193 00:09:56,726 --> 00:09:59,599 ALERT COBRA COMMANDER AND READY THE MISSILES! 194 00:09:59,686 --> 00:10:03,298 COME BACK, YOU SCURVY HOUNDS! 195 00:10:03,385 --> 00:10:07,128 AH, MY OWN BUDDIES LEAVING ME STRANDED OUT HERE WITH -- 196 00:10:07,215 --> 00:10:09,478 OW! WHAT THE... 197 00:10:09,565 --> 00:10:10,914 COBRA! 198 00:10:11,001 --> 00:10:14,091 LOCK IN ON TARGETS. 199 00:10:14,178 --> 00:10:15,745 RIGHT-O! 200 00:10:15,832 --> 00:10:17,573 SHIPWRECK, WHAT'S GOING ON? 201 00:10:17,660 --> 00:10:18,400 GET BACK! 202 00:10:18,487 --> 00:10:19,967 IT'S A COBRA MISSILE! 203 00:10:20,054 --> 00:10:22,578 IF IT LAUNCHES, WE'LL ALL BE KILLED! 204 00:10:22,665 --> 00:10:23,753 FIRE. 205 00:10:23,840 --> 00:10:25,886 WITH PLEASURE, ZARTAN. 206 00:10:27,496 --> 00:10:30,760 ZARTAN, THE FIRE-CONTROL MECHANISM IS OUT! 207 00:10:30,847 --> 00:10:34,024 COBRA COMMANDER MUST STOP THEM WHILE WE FIX THE LAUNCHER! 208 00:10:37,158 --> 00:10:40,552 Cobra Commander: RATTLERS, ATTACK! 209 00:10:46,123 --> 00:10:47,690 COBRA! 210 00:10:50,301 --> 00:10:52,347 RATTLERS! 211 00:10:52,434 --> 00:10:54,828 I'LL BE OKAY! SAVE YOURSELVES! 212 00:10:54,915 --> 00:10:56,786 YO-O-O, JOE! 213 00:10:59,310 --> 00:11:02,183 THEY'LL BE SLAUGHTERED UNLESS I RE-RIG THIS LAUNCHER! 214 00:11:09,320 --> 00:11:13,542 WILD WEASEL TO RATTLER SQUADRON! DON'T LET THEM GET BEHIND YOU! 215 00:11:13,629 --> 00:11:15,762 GOT IT! 216 00:11:17,372 --> 00:11:18,373 WHAT? 217 00:11:18,460 --> 00:11:21,289 MISSILES, ON OUR TAILS! 218 00:11:23,683 --> 00:11:27,034 [ LAUGHS ] YOU CAN JUST IGNORE 'EM, ARNOLD! 219 00:11:27,121 --> 00:11:29,123 THEY'S ALL IMAGINARY! 220 00:11:29,210 --> 00:11:30,559 HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT? 221 00:11:30,646 --> 00:11:32,822 VERY CLEVER. 222 00:11:32,909 --> 00:11:35,346 HAD YOU REMEMBERED TO WATCH BEHIND YOU, 223 00:11:35,433 --> 00:11:37,131 IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN PERFECT. 224 00:11:39,307 --> 00:11:42,092 YEAH, THAT'S SHIPWRECK'S COPTER, ALL RIGHT. 225 00:11:42,179 --> 00:11:43,920 BUT WHERE'S THE SAILOR BOY HIMSELF? 226 00:11:44,007 --> 00:11:46,270 YOU KNOW HIM. LATE TO HIS OWN FUNERAL. 227 00:11:46,357 --> 00:11:49,839 Arnold: IT'S ALL A FAKE -- A FAKE, I TELL YOU! 228 00:11:49,926 --> 00:11:51,101 YES, SHIPWRECK. 229 00:11:51,188 --> 00:11:54,148 YOU'D BETTER COME CLEAN WHILE YOU STILL CAN. 230 00:11:54,235 --> 00:11:55,497 SILENCE! 231 00:11:57,194 --> 00:12:00,023 Woman: THERE IS A 0-3-9 CONTINGENCY 232 00:12:00,110 --> 00:12:01,677 IN THE LOWER AFT RECEIVING DOCK. 233 00:12:01,764 --> 00:12:03,853 ASSAULT TROOPS REPORT FOR BRIEFING. 234 00:12:03,940 --> 00:12:06,421 SUFFERIN' SEAWEED! 235 00:12:06,508 --> 00:12:09,467 TONIGHT'S MOVIE IS "THE AMUSEMENT PARK OF TERROR." 236 00:12:09,554 --> 00:12:11,121 IT'S MAYHEM ON THE MERRY-GO-ROUND 237 00:12:11,208 --> 00:12:12,862 AND REVENGE ON THE ROLLER COASTER 238 00:12:12,949 --> 00:12:16,257 AS THE BAD GUYS TRY TO BEAT THE GOOD GUYS ON THE FERRIS WHEEL. 239 00:12:16,344 --> 00:12:19,956 GOOD, ZARTAN! YOU'VE CAPTURED THE INTRUDERS! 240 00:12:20,043 --> 00:12:22,176 WHO IS THAT BOZO? 241 00:12:22,263 --> 00:12:25,005 THAT MORON IS COBRA COMMANDER. 242 00:12:25,092 --> 00:12:28,530 Cobra Commander: YOUR SCOUTING MISSION IS A FAILURE, SHIPWRECK. 243 00:12:28,617 --> 00:12:30,924 EVEN IF YOU GOT WORD TO YOUR FRIENDS, 244 00:12:31,011 --> 00:12:33,317 YOU'D NEVER BE ABLE TO STOP OUR ASSAULT 245 00:12:33,404 --> 00:12:36,103 ON THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN CHEMICAL-WEAPONS ARSENAL. 246 00:12:36,190 --> 00:12:38,496 YOU'RE AFTER THAT EXPLOSIVE GAS -- 247 00:12:38,583 --> 00:12:40,542 THE STUFF THE ARMY BURIED AROUND HERE! 248 00:12:40,629 --> 00:12:44,981 YOUR ARMY MAY HAVE QUALMS ABOUT USING SUCH WEAPONS, 249 00:12:45,068 --> 00:12:46,809 BUT COBRA DOES NOT! 250 00:12:46,896 --> 00:12:49,377 OH, NOW, WAIT JUST A COTTON-PICKING MINUTE! 251 00:12:49,464 --> 00:12:51,640 CAN THE CHARADE! THIS IS ALL A FAKE! 252 00:12:51,727 --> 00:12:52,684 TELL 'EM, ARNOLD. 253 00:12:52,772 --> 00:12:53,816 Baroness: FOOL! 254 00:12:53,903 --> 00:12:57,602 YOU ARE THE STUPIDEST MALE I EVER MET! 255 00:12:58,734 --> 00:13:00,562 I COULD HAVE TOLD YOU THAT. 256 00:13:00,649 --> 00:13:03,957 YOU VAIN, BABBLING, MORONIC PEACOCK! 257 00:13:04,044 --> 00:13:07,569 MY MISSION WAS TO UNDERMINE JOE SUPPORT AND MORALE 258 00:13:07,656 --> 00:13:11,051 BY FEEDING YOU MINDLESS DRIVEL FOR YOUR NEWS PROGRAM, 259 00:13:11,138 --> 00:13:14,619 BUT THAT -- THAT SAILOR RUINED EVERYTHING! 260 00:13:14,706 --> 00:13:17,231 GLAD TO OBLIGE, BARONESS. 261 00:13:17,318 --> 00:13:20,669 PRELIMINARY SHOCK TROOPS, PREPARE TO MOVE OUT. 262 00:13:20,756 --> 00:13:21,757 NOW! 263 00:13:21,844 --> 00:13:24,455 ZARTAN, LEAD THE OPERATION. 264 00:13:24,542 --> 00:13:28,546 I WILL STAY TO MONITOR JOE ACTIVITY. 265 00:13:28,633 --> 00:13:33,203 WITHIN HOURS, ALL THE EXPLOSIVE GAS WILL BELONG TO COBRA! 266 00:13:33,290 --> 00:13:36,641 AND YOU'RE JUST THE TYPE TO USE IT. 267 00:13:41,124 --> 00:13:43,387 GOT HERE AS SOON AS I COULD. 268 00:13:43,474 --> 00:13:46,434 THIS GUY HECTOR RAMIREZ IS THE TYPE OF NEWS MAN 269 00:13:46,521 --> 00:13:48,697 WHO LOVES DOING A HATCHET JOB ON THE MILITARY. 270 00:13:48,784 --> 00:13:50,394 -WHERE IS HE? -WE DON'T KNOW. 271 00:13:50,481 --> 00:13:52,266 I HAD SHIPWRECK TAKE HIM AROUND THE BASE, 272 00:13:52,353 --> 00:13:54,050 AND NOW HE AND SHIPWRECK ARE MISSING. 273 00:13:54,137 --> 00:13:55,530 Breaker: DUKE! FLINT! 274 00:13:55,617 --> 00:13:58,620 WE INTERCEPTED A COBRA RADIO MESSAGE. 275 00:13:58,707 --> 00:14:00,796 THEY'RE ATTACKING THE CHEMICAL-WEAPONS ARSENAL! 276 00:14:00,883 --> 00:14:03,668 WE CAN'T LET THEM GET THAT GAS. SOUND THE ALERT! 277 00:14:03,755 --> 00:14:05,496 WE'LL WORRY ABOUT RAMIREZ LATER. 278 00:14:13,853 --> 00:14:16,725 THANKS TO OUR TUNNELING MACHINES, 279 00:14:16,812 --> 00:14:19,815 WE FOUND THIS PREVIOUSLY UNDISCOVERED CAVERN -- 280 00:14:19,902 --> 00:14:22,992 A PERFECT BASE FOR OUR OPERATIONS! 281 00:14:23,079 --> 00:14:25,690 I ALWAYS SAID YOU COULDN'T TELL YOUR BASE 282 00:14:25,777 --> 00:14:27,083 FROM A HOLE IN THE GROUND! 283 00:14:27,170 --> 00:14:30,652 I WILL NOT ALLOW SUCH IMPERTINENCE, 284 00:14:30,739 --> 00:14:33,437 ESPECIALLY FROM AN ENLISTED MAN! 285 00:14:33,524 --> 00:14:36,397 BARONESS, DO THE DISHONORS! 286 00:14:36,484 --> 00:14:38,486 WITH PLEASURE. 287 00:14:40,618 --> 00:14:43,056 Cobra Commander: PULVERIZE THEM! 288 00:15:10,561 --> 00:15:12,999 EVERY COBRA TROOPER IN THE WORLD 289 00:15:13,086 --> 00:15:14,609 WAS HIDDEN IN THAT MOUNTAIN! 290 00:15:14,696 --> 00:15:15,915 [ FREEDOM SCREECHING ] 291 00:15:18,743 --> 00:15:22,399 HE WANTS US TO SEE SOMETHING. 292 00:15:27,056 --> 00:15:29,798 HELP, ANYBODY! HELP! 293 00:15:29,885 --> 00:15:32,322 ALL RIGHT, WE'LL SAVE YOU... 294 00:15:32,409 --> 00:15:34,455 FOR A PRICE. 295 00:15:34,542 --> 00:15:35,499 ANYTHING! 296 00:15:35,586 --> 00:15:36,979 [ ROARS ] ANYTHING! 297 00:15:37,066 --> 00:15:39,068 WHERE'S SHIPWRECK AND THE OTHERS? 298 00:15:39,155 --> 00:15:40,983 I-I DON'T KNOW. 299 00:15:41,070 --> 00:15:43,681 -THEN ADIOS. -WAIT! 300 00:15:43,768 --> 00:15:45,857 THEY MIGHT BE IN THE CAVERN. 301 00:15:45,945 --> 00:15:48,382 SAVE ME AND I'LL TELL YOU HOW TO SNEAK IN. 302 00:15:56,738 --> 00:15:58,653 NOW TALK. 303 00:16:05,355 --> 00:16:06,748 WAIT! 304 00:16:06,835 --> 00:16:09,794 ONE LAST REQUEST -- AN INTERVIEW! 305 00:16:12,536 --> 00:16:14,408 WHAT DID YOU SAY? 306 00:16:14,495 --> 00:16:18,890 AN INTERVIEW! I WANT TO INTERVIEW YOU! 307 00:16:23,156 --> 00:16:24,200 SOUND THE ALARM! 308 00:16:34,428 --> 00:16:36,996 FOOLS, TAKE OUT THE TOWERS ONLY! 309 00:16:37,083 --> 00:16:40,129 HIT A GAS BUNKER, AND WE'LL ALL EXPLODE! 310 00:16:49,530 --> 00:16:51,706 THIS IS THE NONLETHAL STUFF -- 311 00:16:51,793 --> 00:16:54,448 LAUGHING GAS, TEAR GAS, YOU KNOW. 312 00:16:54,535 --> 00:16:57,538 THAT THERE'S THE EXPLOSIVE GAS. 313 00:16:57,625 --> 00:17:01,977 RADIO COBRA COMMANDER THAT WE'RE BRINGING IT ALL IN. 314 00:17:02,064 --> 00:17:03,805 WASTE NOT, WANT NOT. 315 00:17:03,892 --> 00:17:05,720 [ LAUGHS EVILLY ] 316 00:17:05,807 --> 00:17:08,114 [ PANTING ] 317 00:17:08,201 --> 00:17:12,944 HERE IT IS -- THE EXHAUST VENT THAT SNAKE TOLD US ABOUT. 318 00:17:13,032 --> 00:17:15,947 RIGHT UNDER OUR NOSES. 319 00:17:19,995 --> 00:17:23,651 BARONESS, WE CAPTURED THE EXPLOSIVE GAS. 320 00:17:23,738 --> 00:17:27,307 WHY ISN'T COBRA COMMANDER HERE TO WITNESS MY TRIUMPH? 321 00:17:30,136 --> 00:17:33,269 HE'S BEING INTERVIEWED FOR TV. 322 00:17:33,356 --> 00:17:38,057 THEN, AFTER LEADING A MUTINY AT MY MILITARY ACADEMY... 323 00:17:38,144 --> 00:17:39,145 [ SIGHS ] 324 00:17:39,232 --> 00:17:41,930 LISTEN UP, YOU BLOODY DINGOS! 325 00:17:42,017 --> 00:17:45,107 EXPLOSIVE GAS TO THE LEFT! 326 00:17:45,194 --> 00:17:51,157 LAUGHING GAS, TEAR GAS, AND THE REST BY THE COMMAND MODULE! 327 00:17:51,244 --> 00:17:54,812 CAN YOU MAKE ANY MORE NOISE THAN THAT, ALPINE? 328 00:17:54,899 --> 00:17:57,946 SHUT UP, UNLESS YOU WANT TO FLY DOWNSTAIRS. 329 00:17:58,033 --> 00:18:00,644 MM. FLY. GOOD IDEA. 330 00:18:00,731 --> 00:18:04,822 FREEDOM, FIND SHIPWRECK. 331 00:18:09,740 --> 00:18:13,266 LOOK, AN EAGLE HAS GOTTEN INTO THE CAVERN. 332 00:18:13,353 --> 00:18:14,789 BYE-BYE, BIRDIE. 333 00:18:14,876 --> 00:18:16,312 FREEDOM! 334 00:18:16,399 --> 00:18:18,706 YOU AIN'T COOKING MY FRIEND'S GOOSE! 335 00:18:20,795 --> 00:18:22,666 THEY MUST'VE SPOTTED US. 336 00:18:22,753 --> 00:18:24,755 NO SENSE BEING SUBTLE NOW. 337 00:18:24,842 --> 00:18:26,975 All: YO-O-O, JOE! 338 00:18:27,062 --> 00:18:29,804 G.I. JOE! WE'RE UNDER ATTACK! 339 00:18:34,374 --> 00:18:37,420 WHY AREN'T THEY SHOOTING BACK? 340 00:18:37,507 --> 00:18:41,511 MAYBE 'CAUSE WE'RE SITTIN' ON A TRUCKLOAD OF EXPLOSIVE GAS. 341 00:18:43,296 --> 00:18:45,428 -HEY, AIN'T THAT... -SHIPWRECK! 342 00:18:45,515 --> 00:18:47,952 HE'S GONNA CRUSH THOSE GAS CYLINDERS! 343 00:18:51,391 --> 00:18:54,785 [ LAUGHING ] 344 00:18:56,135 --> 00:18:58,789 [ LAUGHTER ] 345 00:18:58,876 --> 00:19:01,140 [ LAUGHTER ] 346 00:19:01,227 --> 00:19:03,054 [ LAUGHTER ] 347 00:19:05,144 --> 00:19:07,363 [ LAUGHING ] 348 00:19:07,450 --> 00:19:09,583 ITCHING GAS! 349 00:19:11,454 --> 00:19:13,717 [ LAUGHING ] 350 00:19:13,804 --> 00:19:16,546 EXPLOSIONS! 351 00:19:16,633 --> 00:19:19,070 THERE'LL BE A CAVE-IN! 352 00:19:19,158 --> 00:19:20,376 [ LAUGHTER CONTINUES ] 353 00:19:20,463 --> 00:19:25,251 WE'LL ALL BE CRUSHED TO PULP! 354 00:19:27,992 --> 00:19:31,213 [ Laughing ] HATE TO LAUGH AND RUN, 355 00:19:31,300 --> 00:19:33,694 BUT WE GOT TO GET OUT OF HERE! 356 00:19:33,781 --> 00:19:35,826 [ LAUGHING ] 357 00:19:40,309 --> 00:19:42,224 THEY'RE ESCAPING! 358 00:19:42,311 --> 00:19:45,009 THE CAVERN'S EXPLODING! 359 00:19:45,096 --> 00:19:46,837 WHAT'S SO FUNNY? 360 00:19:52,016 --> 00:19:53,844 NO! 361 00:19:53,931 --> 00:19:56,934 [ LAUGHING ] 362 00:19:57,021 --> 00:20:00,808 WE'D BETTER GET OUT BEFORE EVERYTHING COLLAPSES! 363 00:20:00,895 --> 00:20:02,331 [ LAUGHS ] 364 00:20:06,248 --> 00:20:07,510 [ LAUGHTER ] 365 00:20:07,597 --> 00:20:10,861 IF WE DON'T GET OUT OF HERE [LAUGHS] 366 00:20:10,948 --> 00:20:13,647 WE'RE FINISHED! 367 00:20:13,734 --> 00:20:15,214 [ LAUGHS ] 368 00:20:15,301 --> 00:20:18,304 WELL, C'EST LA VIE, MATE! 369 00:20:20,262 --> 00:20:23,396 NO, REALLY! COME ON! 370 00:20:23,483 --> 00:20:25,572 WE MUST ESCAPE! 371 00:20:25,659 --> 00:20:27,269 [ LAUGHS ] 372 00:20:32,056 --> 00:20:35,234 ANY SIGN OF WHERE COBRA WENT? 373 00:20:35,321 --> 00:20:37,975 NO. THE TRAIL SEEMS TO DISAPPEAR. 374 00:20:38,062 --> 00:20:39,368 WAIT, LOOK OUT THERE! 375 00:20:39,455 --> 00:20:42,284 Duke: THIS MUST BE COBRA'S DOING! 376 00:20:45,635 --> 00:20:47,811 [ LAUGHTER CONTINUES ] 377 00:20:47,898 --> 00:20:50,031 UH-OH! 378 00:20:50,945 --> 00:20:53,121 SHIPWRECK! 379 00:20:53,208 --> 00:20:54,601 WOULD YOU MIND TELLING ME 380 00:20:54,688 --> 00:20:57,560 WHAT THE BLOODY BLUE BLAZES IS GOING ON?! 381 00:20:57,647 --> 00:20:59,736 [ LAUGHING ] 382 00:21:01,869 --> 00:21:03,131 IT WAS GREAT! 383 00:21:03,218 --> 00:21:05,438 IT WAS WONDERFUL! 384 00:21:05,525 --> 00:21:07,440 EMMY MATERIAL! 385 00:21:07,527 --> 00:21:10,791 A PULITZER PRIZE! 386 00:21:10,878 --> 00:21:13,228 THERE'S WAS LAUGHING GAS AND FIGHTING 387 00:21:13,315 --> 00:21:15,970 AND GUNS AND EXPLOSIONS! 388 00:21:16,057 --> 00:21:18,320 I GOT IT ALL ON TAPE! 389 00:21:18,407 --> 00:21:20,235 I'VE GOT TO GET THIS TO MY NETWORK! 390 00:21:20,322 --> 00:21:23,151 FANTASTIC! WHAT A SCOOP! 391 00:21:23,238 --> 00:21:24,979 MWAH! LOVE YOU! 392 00:21:25,066 --> 00:21:27,547 YOU JOES ARE GREAT! 393 00:21:32,421 --> 00:21:34,380 [ LAUGHTER CONTINUES ] 394 00:21:34,467 --> 00:21:36,904 I'D LIKE AN EXPLANATION FOR ALL THIS. 395 00:21:36,991 --> 00:21:38,732 [ LAUGHTER CONTINUES ] 396 00:21:38,819 --> 00:21:42,692 ON SECOND THOUGHT... FORGET IT.